when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
