it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Randomize
