about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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