You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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