And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Randomize
