so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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