around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
