i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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