Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
