why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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