Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I need to wash the frat house off of me
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I'm really busy with my period
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