the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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