he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize