those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
