He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize