part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
