you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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