what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
