Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
