so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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