idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize