is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
