And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
