Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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