and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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