my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
