There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
