We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I think a kid would responsible me up
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
