I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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