I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
