she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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