Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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