Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
