i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
