OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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