My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
