He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Alive.
So much puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much rum. So many feels.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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