my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
vagina is talking i cant
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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