Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
