K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Operation Purity has been aborted
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I AM VODKA MAN
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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