The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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