fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
