Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
