We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Randomize
