whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
