and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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