The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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