Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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