Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
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he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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