her vagine was all disorganized.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize