My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
