god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
